Today I feel like a ladybug: bright and colorful with a voracious appetite.

Today I feel nostalgic. I want to feel holiday cheer the way a child does. Could Santa be real? Will it snow and shut down the city? Can we walk and sled in the streets?

Today I feel like stargazing. With a hot cup of spiced cider in my hands I’ll make up names for made up constellations and reflect on how tiny we are in this big old universe.

Today I feel like a leaf. I’m clinging to my base for dear life but nearly ready to succumb to being blown around wherever fate will take me.

Today I feel surreal. It’s as though all the bustling of holiday shoppers, downtown commuters, and noisy traffic jams are being whisked around, not of their own accord, but by the crispy cold wind that cuts sharply through our layers.

Today I want to feel passion and time stand still.

Today I feel blessed. It has been a very successful year and I’m ready to wrap a nice little bow around 2011 and send it on its way.

Today, I imagine the Wales family is feeling some of the very same things but for very different reasons. With a little one due to arrive this spring and news of the sex of their baby just days away, they’re surely feeling all this and more.

Julia, whatever you’re feeling today, I hope these images are received with joy and excitement. May your holidays as a family of three be filled with much celebration and jubilation as you transform into a family of four. I look forward to seeing you all again in a few months once the little one arrives!

My first one is on my inner, right ankle. I got it while in the Ozarks of Missouri with my little sister for her graduation from basic training. It’s a kanji symbol that stands for femininity…in the way that the sun is masculine and the moon is feminine…or so that’s what we’re told. An ironic choice considering that, my little sister, after having her inner ankle freshly inked with a sharp needle, rolled her tall socks up over her wound, laced up her tall, shiny, black boots and marched back to base in an anything but feminine cadence. I took a print of the tattoo back home with me so our youngest sister could have the same one done here in Seattle. I love that wherever we go, we each have that reminder of each other.

The second tattoo was a birthday gift to myself…my sign. The Archer or Sagittarius. A bent arrow on my back. It’s on my spine between the shoulder blades. I remember just before the artist got started he asked, “straight arrow or bent?” And without hesitation, I confirmed, bent. I guess you could say, I’m the kind of person who likes detours.

The third tattoo is on my right side from my hip to…a little lower than my armpit. It hurt. A lot. Every.Single.Rib. I could feel the vibration of the needle in the pit of my stomach for all three hours I sat on that work bench. But, the pain is temporary, tattoos are forever, and the end result are some fairly impressive gray branches and pink blossoms on a blooming cherry tree inked into my side. I absolutely love that time of year here, when all of a sudden there are pink trees blooming everywhere. And just as Spring gets really rolling, it begins snowing pink and white blossoms. You have to take it all in quickly because before you know it, they’re gone.

And…drum roll please…that’s how we get to these gorgeous red, yellow and orange trees of Autumn. My left side is begging for them. I want to take the canvas of the Bellevue Botanical Gardens on a Fall morning, like this one with the Mitchell Family, and condense them into one fiery tree inked into my skin. Wow, right? I know. I had an appointment set at my favorite shop in October…but October turned into a really busy month for me. What with running off to Portland on a train with a few friends to marry my soul mate…for starters. It too, was a beautiful Fall day with the leaves changing and a fantastic blue sky. The next weekend we flew to California to meet my in-laws for the very first time. That adventure was a pretty big deal too. Somehow, life got so full  I didn’t have room for that tattoo appointment. So full of love, adventures, and a general wave of life changing experiences. This has pretty much been a remarkably wild year. And I couldn’t be happier.

Speaking of wild and happy, I had a wildly good time with the Mitchell Family last month. I loved having the opportunity to photograph them again this year and see how much the boys have grown. Liting, after last years rain out, I’m so glad you finally got the outdoor shoot you always wanted…blue skies and all.

How to Survive a Family Photo Shoot

• Take a shower and wash your hair. Wear something that makes you feel beautiful. Appreciate your soft, round middle and tired yet smiling eyes. Do not be shy about the fact that you have cleavage and really great shoes.
• Ask for help when you need it and remember patience is a virtue.
• Breathe. You’ll need to be comforted and reassured over and over again–how could you not? You were meant to be loved, so let it in. Inhale. Exhale. Breathe.
• Play whatever game your kids are playing. Stop apologizing. Stop explaining. I’ve seen it all before.
• Don’t hold back. Allow yourself to be ridiculous and feel joy. Put all your energy into the place where your heart is leading.
• Play your favorite song on your iPhone, set it for repeat, and dance to it like no one is watching…or everyone is watching.
• Submit to the chaos. This can be terrifying and uncomfortable but there’s nothing to do but ride it out. It is critical for you to understand that there is no wrong move here and the powerful energy around you is going to happen with or without your blessing.
• Let go of all your assumptions. You don’t know how this adventure will play out and you are not in control. Face the moment with eyes wide open, unafraid, knowing that love is all that matters and everyone is working towards a happy ending.
• Smile. Let your eyes say everything. Shine.

Hopefully, this dream will find me soon. In the meantime, I get to live vicariously through awesome families like this one.

I met the Couch Family for their session at the Olympic Sculpture Park just blocks from Sean’s pre-baby bachelor pad. We rocked the park, the waterfront, and some very artistic alley’s in the Belltown neighborhood. And by rock, I’m in rock-n-roll!! We called ahead to Mother Nature and requested she turn on the wind machine and pump up the setting sun. She did not disappoint.

I think like-minded free spirits are attracted to me. They find me like a magnet and we have the most interesting time getting to know each other by being foolishly in love, letting our hair down and saying “yes, please.” You know, the people who don’t think twice about hopping the fence for an adventure on the other side. Maybe you’re someone who takes the long way home and are totally okay with being lost for awhile? We would be friends. When you meander, magic happens. And by magic, I mean unbridled laughter, unruly curls, and uninhibited love…for starters.

Sara, thank you for choosing me to be your family photographer. Editing your session was an eye candy treat that filled me with such happiness as I replayed our date in Belltown again and again. I hope that when these memories finally make it to your walls you feel the same kind of love…only deeper. Because it’s your love story and you are loved.

There was a time when I hated my sisters borrowing my clothes. I didn’t want them in my room and I didn’t want them touching my stuff. Unless of course, they were cleaning my room, which I paid them to do on more than one occasion. Sadly, my underpaid wages are no longer enticing to them anymore.

Nowadays, we all have a collection of each other’s clothes in our own homes and closets. I love it when someone compliments my outfit and asks where I got it. “Oh these shoes are my sister’s and this shirt…belongs to my other sister”. And I love it when they’re in my room. My living room. My bathroom. My dining room. My kitchen. I love it when they’re in my space and I love that we can share all kinds of stuff. Gone are the days of tossing the youngest down the laundry chute. These are the days when we giggle about laundry rooms gone up in flames and the miracle of magic erasers (Seriously. What is in them!?).

So it was an absolute delight to photograph my friend Jon with his girls. These girls who have so many things in common and yet are all so very different. His girls are confident and sassy; hysterical and oh, so pretty. Poor Jon is clearly outnumbered by this troupe of girls and such a good sport. They all make a pretty good team. After a trip to Uwajimaya for homemade sushi fixin’s, we strolled through Carillon Point just a couple of hours before sunset. Each girl flaunted her own unique personality and I felt like one of The Girls amongst their dimpled smiles and bouncy hair.

After an hour plus of skipping and giggling we returned to their casa for comfy clothes and a smorgasbord of sushi. A truly impressive display of teamwork and artwork went into the assembly of enough rice, fish and veggies to feed a small army. We finally called it quits when the last of the rice was used up. What happened next still gives me heart squeeze.

The Girls setup pillows and blankets across the living room floor and they huddled together around their buffet for family movie night. Delicate fingers stuffed giant balls of delicately wrapped sushi into their hungry mouths. And for the first time in hours, it was silent. With heavy eyes and a full belly I left them before the end of the movie. But not before we hugged it out and made promises to hang out again soon. Those girls.

Thank you for a spectacular sunny afternoon. Thanks for letting me be one of The Girls. I loved it more than you can imagine.

And this is pretty much how I live my life. On the go, in the moment, and fully flexible. It makes me feel good to indulge in not having it all figured out. Following instincts and obeying intuition is an act that helps me get through most situations with confidence and creativity. It helps that I have partners and clients in my life that allow me to live and work this way. When I act boldly, without fear, I earn trust. And there’s a special magic that happens when my value’s match up with someone else’s. We reach a sweet spot where we all come alive and create something special. A bond. A connection. A smile. A beautiful memory. A series of photographs that tell an entire story about who we are right now. And it makes me really happy.

Kelsey, it was so lovely to see you and your growing family again. Thank you for wandering through the Bellevue Botanical Gardens with me despite the heat and swarms of mosquitoes. I hope you enjoyed every moment of togetherness as much as I did.

Internet, It’s been ages since I’ve shared anything personal here and I miss that very much. I find myself in the heart of a busy portrait season with the rest of my year booked out (thank you). And while this is exactly what I’ve been working towards, I have to be honest about all the other noise going on in the background. It sounds a lot like change, new beginnings, big moves, fresh love…and I can’t quite put it all into words just yet. Only feelings. And they’re spilling out all over my photographs. Tender and raw; restless with many layers. There’s so much of myself that is fully present in the right ways and completely checked out in others. I’m harnessing the energy of new and powerful relationships and feeling it beat deeply in my heart. To be on the receiving end of joy makes me feel like celebrating…every.single.precious.moment. I am so very lucky to be present for this life. These opportunities. This love.

And while I’m being cryptic and gushy I might as well say that a line was drawn in the sand this past Spring and I stepped over it. On this side of the line I feel my essence pulsating through my body. I gush. I laugh. I hardly sleep. To bring it full circle, I see my identity wrapped up in so many things outside myself, like in these photographs, and I get so excited to tear the wrapper off and discover what’s inside. This kind of bliss does not happen often and I do not take it lightly. While honoring my core, I may make a fool out of myself from time to time, but I believe it’s part of the adventure and I’m becoming the finest version of myself to date. These next few months are going to be big for me. HUGE! And while parts of me are paralyzed by how fast things are moving, I know that my life has been leading up to this chapter for a long time. This is exactly where I’m supposed to be.

“Hey, I bought us a photo session with this really cool local photographer. She’s going to meet us at a park and photograph us for a couple of hours. Isn’t that awesome!?”

And before she could even get to the part about planning outfits and the setting sun, they were like, “Are you kidding me!? I’m not photogenic. This isn’t a special occasion. I don’t want to get dressed up and have some stranger making me feel self conscious for 1-2 hours.”

Which is totally normal, by the way. Even Tina Fey gets nervous about photo shoots. She told me. Okay, I read it in her book. My point is, there’s a lot of pressure when you feel like you have to perform and no one wants to see a bad picture of themselves. It’s like hearing your voice on an answering machine – I do not sound like that.

So I assured them that this was not your typical go-to-the-mall-sit-stiffly-say-cheese experience. No, this would be more like hanging out with your girlfriends; no heavy posing or cajoling. Simply relaxed, stress free and fun for everyone. I asked questions. What do they like doing together? What would make them feel safe? This is the pre-close-up. The time when I start to learn who my subjects really are and what’s holding them back.

“We like to cook and eat together,” Ariana told me. So we decided on a session at home with the idea of sharing a meal in the backyard. Whatever happens, happens. At home, they were safe and cozy in a nest where they were free to love each other and be loved. At home, following a relaxing day at the spa, sitting at an adorably decorated table with mouth watering smells and flavors at each place setting, they found peace. They were connected to each other by things that really matter and shared conversations only they could follow. Synergy.

They slowly opened up and allowed me to see the truth of who they are from deep within. And now they’re exposed. Internet, this is a gift to be allowed to lean in and see. Really see. There is energy, passion, push and pull here. There is vulnerability and power here. There is love and beauty here. See…

I could tell Rachel was nervous that Liam wasn’t performing well during their Gas Works Park family session a couple weeks ago. “Everyone always looks so happy in your pictures,” she said with concern. I reassured her over and over that things were going well and I was getting great shots but I know it’s hard to believe me when your toddler isn’t doing what you think they should be doing (i.e. looking at the camera, smiling, sitting still). How do you take someone seriously when they’re sprawled out on the concrete taking pictures with one hand? Did she really just toss a ball in the air, clap, make funny noises and stillll get a good picture? Yes. Yes, I did.  And I can confidently say, “Rachel, your family looks really happy too.” You don’t even need a magic wand to see that.

Rachel, Eric and Liam, thank you for a delightful, sunny morning at Gas Works Park. I had so much fun getting to know you, rolling around in the grass, and watching your family love on each other. Thank you for choosing me to be your family photographer. It’s truly an honor.